The Myth of Sisyphus, part 1

I have just begun reading Albert Camus's essay, 'The Myth of Sisyphus.' In discussing the difficulty of understanding a man's thought pattern that leads to suicide Camus writes, "But one would have to know whether a friend of the desperate man had not that very day addressed him indifferently." To me this means that the suicidal person, when they feel that even their closest acquntances place little value on their life, their mind equates this to suicide having little impact on their closest friends lives and also that they have little to live for.

Why I think this part hit me hard today...
Earlier this afternoon poignant greif stirred up inside me when I felt as though a person whom I care for deeply was post-poning responding to me. This has always bothered me. I find myself overcome by anxiety when I get the sense that someone that I assumed to care deeply for me would respond more quickly to a new acquiantance's request than my own.